Calgary unequivically wins

Here I was sitting at my computer trying to think of something to write today. I could bitch, again, about the Avs off season signings. I could take the day off. I could actually do some work (/pause for laughter)...

But really I didn't have anything. Until This.

Now I have something. If anything can describe the Western Conference contenders this summer it was the arms race that had built since July 1. I mean you have the terrible twins of jackassery residing in Anaheim, Burke and Pronger (and their sidekick May). Then the Avs signed the Swedish Goldmember Ledin and added that Baron of Bastardy Darcy Tucker.

Ottawa foiled some Western Conference teams plan to upgrade their antagonism by signing Jarko Ruutu. Still Detroit did their best to upgrade here as well by actually turning Marion Hossa into Ho$$a. By then the Western Conference had added Ledin, Tucker, and Hossa to the already impressive nincompoop lineup of the names mentioned above and also McLeod, Tootoo, Carcillo and a whole bunch of others. Not to be outdone the Dallas Stars went out and dropped what they thought was the equivalent of the Hiroshima bomb of malevolence on the Western Conference by signing none other than Sean Avery.

In all this the moves by Calgary seemed to be overlooked. In fact they got rid of Goddard, which meant that that Duke of Douche, Phanaeuf, would be working only with Sarich.

But the news linked to above means that the Flames have stolen Dallas' thunder by signing the "Fat Man" to Dallas' new "Little Boy" of Ass-holiness. Isn't there some sort of dumbass salary-cap instituted by the league with Calgary now far exceeding it. Now Calgary employs what can only be called the Dynamic Duo of Douchebags, with Bertuzzi playing Saruman to the Duke of Douche's Sauron may just earn Calgary the title of most reviled team in the NHL. Way to go Calgary.

8 comments:

  1. I was going to write the same thing but then the World Juniors are coming to town so I decided I was going to toss that up quickly.

    Dynamic Duo of Douchebags. I love it. I hate to bestow any sort of title on those two but that one is pretty apt.

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  2. You're so, so, so, so right. What is Calgary thinking?

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  3. Dynamic Duo of Douchebags. I love it. I hate to bestow any sort of title on those two but that one is pretty apt

    I had my inner-Muhammed Ali goign on today

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  4. 1) Somehow it would seem more appropriate to imagine Burt Ward of Batman fame saying your phrase: "Holy Dynamic Duo of Douchebags"! LOL
    2) We were hoping that your team would have signed T-Bert. Now THAT would have been amusing!
    3) Seriously though, at under 2 mil he's worth the gamble. The 2 year 8 mil that Burke gave him last year was plane stupid(or was that hush money?) ; )

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  5. jibble...morrison (ducks) and federov (caps) have left the market. Are you ok man? Do you need a tissue or anything? ;)

    -doc

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  6. If i do recall, werent we going to become more of a speedy team to counteract this Dynamic Duo of Douchebags? i mean werent we going to leave them in the dust with our shear speed and quickness? Wow, where is this organization going.
    even when we try to match their douchery we didnt sign avery, or bertuzzi (THANK HEAVEN), or boogard (again thank heavens), all we got was this guy from sweden, per ledin, tucker, who i am actually quite excited about, and we are probably going to resign mcleod and mccromick neither of which can match the utter douchery douhbaginess of our norwestern friends

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  7. jibble...morrison (ducks) and federov (caps) have left the market. Are you ok man? Do you need a tissue or anything? ;)

    Pissed off. I don't see how the Avs can compete for the cup with the center core the way it is, with or without Sakic

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  8. actually, I'm not too bummed about missing on Federov (4m!!) or Morrison (2.75m). At those prices at least, yeesh. MAYBE Morrison is worth that, but Federov, no way.

    Peca though, he signed for 1.3m. I have a hard time believing we couldn't have topped that, and I wish we would have.

    -doc

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